


Linger

by subterfuge



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:22:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27928222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/subterfuge/pseuds/subterfuge
Summary: Maybe this was it. Maybe this is how they got back together.Or maybe they’re done for good.
Relationships: Lee Taeyong/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Comments: 1
Kudos: 18





	Linger

**Author's Note:**

> This is not a canon fic, I just didn’t feel like adding any details. Also vague about other things because I don’t know if I want to continue or do a prequel.
> 
> Anyway I’m sad.

Taeyong was on his belly, stretching like a cat, when Johnny came back to the bed. He hummed as Johnny cleaned him up.

“God, I needed that.”

“What, to be fucked into the mattress on a Thursday?” He could practically hear Johnny grinning.

He’d roll his eyes if he had them opened. “To be fucked at all. It’s been a long time.” He stretched again.

Johnny, having finished cleanup, collapsed on his side, facing Taeyong. Taeyong forced his eyes open and took in Johnny’s features greedily, now that he could again.

Being this close with Johnny was definitely something he missed. Maybe this was it. Maybe this was how they got back together.

“Can’t have been that long. Come on, when’s the last time you got laid?” 

Now he did roll his eyes, though his smile gave away his amusement. “You’re so annoying. Do you really want me to say it?”

Johnny’s grin faded into a soft smile. He tucked the stray hair that had fallen onto Taeyong’s face behind his ear. 

“I won’t be mad, I promise.”

Why would Johnny be mad? “Okay, fine. Hm, when was it, last October?” 

Johnny rose up to lean on his elbow, surprised. “Last year?” 

Taeyong closed his eyes, completely exhausted and ready to sleep. “Mhm. That’s when we were last together, right?” 

It was quiet now and Taeyong could feel himself drifting off. He was a little cold even with the blanket now on his back, but he knew Johnny would come wrap an arm around him and warm him up. 

Johnny. 

His eyes popped open and he saw Johnny still in the same position staring at him incredulously. 

“...What?” 

“You’re lying.” 

Johnny’s cold voice shocked his brain into waking up fully. 

“Lying?” He sat up, pulling the blanket around his waist and squinted down at Johnny. “Why would I be lying?”

Johnny shrugged. He turned and rested his back on the headboard and examined his nails. “Oh I don’t know, maybe because the way you are very… active. No way you went all this time without getting some.”

Taeyong blinked. Did he just—

“Okay, so I’m a slut and a liar. Great. Thanks.” He slid out of bed and grabbed some clothes. His anger was rising and there was hurt in his chest making it hard to breathe. He couldn’t do this, he couldn’t be here anymore even though this was his room. 

“I didn’t say that. Why are you acting like this? I told you it was fine if you’d just tell me,” Johnny said, unmoving from his place on Taeyong’s bed. 

“Tell you what?” he paused to pull his shirt on over his head and then frowned at Johnny. “Who is it that I’m supposedly fucking? Or is it everyone since I can’t seem to keep it in my pants?”

Johnny finally sat up and picked up his discarded clothes just off the side of the bed. He shrugged and mumbled, “I don’t know, Jongin, for one. Yukhei, maybe. That one guy from the studio...”

“Are you fucking kidding me.” 

Taeyong’s temples ached at this point and realized it was because he was clenching his jaw so hard. He needed to leave. 

“You know, this is still the same, it’s the same reason why we broke up. You’re so insecure or something and I don’t want to be around you at all.” 

Taeyong pulled a jacket from the stand but held it in his arms. “I don’t get why you can’t understand that I love you, that I’ve always only loved you, and that I wanted to express that. But instead you think I’m a slut and you broke up with me.” Taeyong took a deep breath. 

“Can you just be gone by the time I get back.” He pulled on his jacket and went to leave, but a hand on the door stopped him.

“Wait. Please.” 

Taeyong took another deep breath. He should just leave, he doesn’t need to hear whatever else Johnny has to say because he’ll just end up hurt more. 

“Please.”

Taeyong turned around and leaned against the door. “What?” he asked as unemotional as he could. He looked up at Johnny, a slight thump in his heart whenever he realized how tall he was. His shirt was unbuttoned, hanging on his shoulders, and his pants were on, unzipped. He stepped a little closer, practically cornering Taeyong in.

“You love me? Still?” he said softly, making Taeyong a little more angry. He looked up at the ceiling, if only to avoid Johnny’s gaze.

“I wish I didn’t right now.” Then he glared at Johnny. “Why did you have to ruin this?”

Johnny, to his credit, actually seemed remorseful. “I—I was sure. The way you are with them, you’re not like that with anyone else. Not even me. I was jealous. I am jealous. I’m stupid and I’m sorry.”

Taeyong still glared, not ready to accept. 

Then there was a tiny, ugly thought in the back of his head. He should ignore it, he thought, he doesn’t want that question answered, but the more he thought about it, in that span of a few seconds, the more it grew in his head until he had to ask it.

“When was the last time _you_ got laid?” 

The silence in the moments after was overwhelming and Taeyong figured he had his answer. Johnny had long since moved on and Taeyong was hung up on him like a fool. 

“Why?” Johnny asked quietly, stepping back a little. 

“It’s a simple question, Johnny. With a simple answer.”

“You don’t want to know.” 

_Obviously,_ Taeyong thought but he persisted anyway. 

“You’re allowed to ask but I’m not?” 

“We were broken up.”

“Yeah, you ended it, I remember. That doesn’t answer the question.” 

Johnny busied himself with fixing his pants and buttoning his shirt.

“Suddenly you don’t want to have this conversation, huh. You put this relationship all on me and now you can’t even be honest—“

“Last week.”

Those two words felt like they were stabbed into his stomach. Last week? Fuck. 

Taeyong would have sat down if he didn’t want to flee immediately. In his mind, he was turning the doorknob and leaving the apartment, but in reality he was frozen in place with another question he didn’t want to know the answer to.

“Who?”

Johnny fidgeted, very unlike him, and stared at the floor. 

“You know.” 

It was like a slap in the face. Taeyong would have crumpled to the floor if he wasn’t trying to keep it together. 

He ignored his eyes filling up with tears and asked, “How long?”

“Um, June,” he said in the quietest voice Taeyong has ever heard from Johnny.

Taeyong smothered a sob he didn’t know was coming as a few tears spilled from his eyes. Three months. 

“June?” Johnny nodded. “June, when you said nothing was going on with him?” Another nod. “Jesus Christ, Johnny, and you try to come at me for lying?” 

Trying to force himself into leaving the room, Taeyong turned to the door and grabbed the knob but didn’t turn it. He needed one last thing answered before leaving Johnny.

He only asked it when he got his voice under control. “Are you still with him?”

“Please don’t leave, Yongie. Will you hear me out? It’s complicated.” 

“So, that’s a yes,” he said, not turning from the door.

“No, we were never together. Don’t leave, we can talk about this.” 

“Why would I listen to anything you say,” he said over his shoulder. “I don’t want to see you when I get back.”


End file.
